Eller

Nothin' makes my day more than for L.R. "Eller" Williamson to stop by and see me. I'll Suwannee! He's a fuckin' diamond in the dung. He might want to call first next time, however. He had the unpleasant surprise of seeing me in my birthday suit. You can imagine how wrinkled it is after ninety-one years, for crying out loud. Anyway, he stopped by and Maxine told him he could go on back to my apartment. I was standing at the back door, naked as a jay bird, smoking one of my mood ciggies, when he popped his head in. He turned as red as a beet and hightailed it back out into the table area of the cafe and waited for me there. When I emerged, I made sure I was completely dressed. One day I was nearly to the cash register when I realized I'd forgotten to put on my britches. Thank the Lord Constance wasn't there to snap a picture or I'd have been front- and-center on the first page of The Herald. 

So, Eller and me, we had us a cup of coffee together. I tell you, if I were fifty-five years younger, and he were straight, I know he would have been one of my husbands. As it is now, I just think he's as cute as a button. 

That book he wrote, Prairie Springs, is going to be a hit one day. I keep tellin' people to buy it. We got a stack of 'em here by the register and they sell like hotcakes. The ones who read it, come back and buy more copies to give as gifts. And I get more fan mail than I have in my life. Actually, it's the first time I've ever gotten any fan mail. He done me up real swell in the book. 

I'm as wired as an electrical outlet. I'm on my third expresso this afternoon. We started selling Cuban coffee and I cain't get enough. I'd better stop now or I won't be able to close my eyes when I go to bed. Friday's are always late nights anyways. It's the one night when the high school kids—those old enough to drive—come in and drink coffee. 

I got to do my taxes. You'd think they'd put an age limit on that shit. Every fuckin' year, it's the same mess of paperwork. I ain't gotta a clue what I'm doin', so I just do the best I can. 

Y'all have a good weekend. Keep the questions coming. My email address is winniecollins@gmail.com. 

All my love,

Edwina